


Extremely Accurate, Basically Plagiarism

by Anonymous



Category: Mother 2: Gyiyg no Gyakushuu | EarthBound
Genre: Derogatory Language, Other, Teen Angst, Verbal Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-12 14:08:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19230670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: For those who haven't played EarthBound, this is simply the written account of Ness' encounter with Giygas. No filler added.





	Extremely Accurate, Basically Plagiarism

Adjusting his hat, Ness laughed. His adventure really ended  _here_ , with this unborn  _coward_? He almost wished it was more climactic, but it wasn’t worth risking the lives of his friends. After all, they weren’t the sturdiest crew. Not compared to Ness.

Displaying only the most upright and heroic maladjustment, Ness approached Giygas—the “final boss,” if you will—and crossed his own mechanical arms. Truly, there was no need for a battle. Ness could handle this with a single move. A single, merciless, Omega-leveled move.

Ness could handle this with  _PSI Disgrace_.

“Pussy ass bitch,” Ness barked at the dark, swirling figure. Giygas paused—or, rather, the air itself stood still, as if confused. Stunned. Hurt. He wasn’t exactly the most sensitive extraterrestrial fetus, but, like all of God’s creatures, he had feelings. Ness knew that weakness better than anyone else.

After all, it was how he got here.

Ness clenched his metallic fists. Giygas wasn’t yet defeated, but  _PSI Disgrace_  had so much left to offer. It would only be a matter of time before Ness emerged victorious from the towering vag—um, cave. He just needed to channel another 5% of his power.

“I fucked your mom last night.”

First,  _silence_. It didn’t last long.

Then, Giygas thrashed uncontrollably, spreading his gaseous body across the cave in a fit of unbridled anguish. The air thinned and the red paled, but Giygas’ form had only multiplied. Collectively sobbing in utter helplessness, hundreds of embryonic eyes were forced to witness their own  _coup de grâce_ , the final crushing blow of  _PSI Disgrace_ :

“Literally kill yourself.”

And that was that.

Screaming Ness’ name in a plea for mercy— _“Ness, Ness, Ness,”_ —Giygas began to diminish like a dying fire: as red-hot as ever, but with nothing left to burn. His hopes, his dreams, his  _future_ —it was all cut short. No longer could Giygas restore peace on Earth, and no longer could he comfort the souls that needed it most. It was going to be his gift to humanity, tied together with none other than a sparkling sheet of wrapping paper and a kiss.

_No point in delivering it now._

Love was no longer in Giygas’ heart. Ness robbed him of it. Ness robbed him of everything. As the distressed shrieks quieted and the red murk subsided, the young heroes departed from the Devil’s Machine for good, leaving only the shriveled remains of Giygas and That Other Guy in their dust. Finally, their dimension was back to normal.

All that was left was for Ness to return home, the place he loved most. Truly, it was where he belonged: a place without fear, without judgment. A place of love. His mother was waiting.

 _Insufferable bitch_ , Ness mused.  _Thinks she can play my Xbox, like, whenever. Thinks I won’t find out._

_Fuck you, Mom._

**Author's Note:**

> bruh


End file.
